FRIDAY ZINGERS

I just bit into the worst apple of my career. Granular, pesticidal, soft. Awful, awful, awful.

But then this three-legged wonder showed up, and poof, apple disappointment gone.

RACIALARIOUS

It read like a classic Yellow journalism headline, but it was about bugs, so I tuned out, and went back to practicing my fake English accent.

LIDELL LIVES UP TO MY PERSONAL HYPE

I've seen Jamie Lidell twice in concert. The first time was at the Harbourfront Music Fest. His whole system crapped out midway through the set, but that didn't stop the rock, oh no, Lidell brushed it off with the nonchalance of 1950s cool guy. A few months later I saw him put on an excellent show at Lee's Palace (which will now be referred to as Lee's Paradise). In both cases I was taken aback by his charisma, and pyjamas.
I was certain that Lidell wouldn't disappoint in person. I was right. You know someone's on point if they can do bang on impersonations of every single Doobie brother, Phil Colins, and Lionel Richie. Damn. He's easy on the eyes too. I'll have my interview done today, but it'll be in French. I'll try and post the Anglo version.

WHO'S WITH ME ON THIS?

Wouldn't it to be great to wake up everyday with this kind of energy? I'm about 80% sure he's a human. But a case could be made for geriatric cyborg, or haggard, yet curiously happy, Hulk. Either way I'm convinced. I hope this man makes energy drinks because I want to live off them. I would also like to spend an entire day smashing things, and complaining about modern day foibles like "people don't wear hats like they used to" and "the pictures"

FASHION WEEK

Last week in Paris, and it's fashion week! The plan is to see how many glasses of champagne I can score because that's what it's all about. That and shit talk, lots and lots of shit talk.

NOT SO TERRIBLE

I was quick to judge this funny movie posters blog mostly because it didn't live up to its name. Fresh Prince of Persia? Really? Come on. But sometimes the shitball blogs drag me in (as well as those terrible "funny picture" sites that seem to recycle the same tired Russian cops wasted pics like they're some sort of ancient currency), and I can't help but check out their wares. Anyway I was pleasantly surprised to discover this gem:
What an excellent premise for a film. Is there anything better than imagining curious bears roaming around a submarine? Sure they're ferocious, and would run amok killing all those aboard, but there's something Biblical about it. A bloodier, less impossible version of Noah's Ark. Ok maybe not, but a version of this should be made with bear suits. Gorillas on a submarine could also work.

YESTERDAY: RAD. TODAY: WRECKED

I'm really happy my expression turned out exactly the way I wanted.