TODAY'S SPECIAL EXPLAINED!

Out of context most children's television doesn't follow any real logic. Today's Special is a perfect example. Here's the pitch for the TVO execs:
"Shit's gonna be classic: a magical mannequin, rhyming mouse puppet, Walter Matthau/Security guard puppet...

"A magical mannequin? I'm not sure I follow..."
"His name is Jeff he is the crux of show. Not to sound too hyperbolic, but throughout history certain objects have had a profound impact on humankind: the holy grail, the Arc of the Covenant, and now Jeff's hat. Yes, by merely placing the magical chapeau upon his dream box, Jeff becomes a sweet man-child only trying to understand the world around him, while simultaneously cursed to spend his life in a department store, and to live constant fear of losing the enchanted hat."

"My god Clemens, your prowess in the children's t.v circuit is goddamn impressive, gives me goosebumps. Who else knows about Jeff?"
"Jodie. She's the voice of reason of the TS gang. She's also black and wears a two toned jumpsuit."
"You sir, are a daring son of a bitch, but that's why we hired you. I expect to see some finished scripts by the end of the week. And, for god's sake, get some sleep. After the Crofft incident we don't want any more accidents.

Some big footed stripper left her shoes in our office, so I decided them to give them a go. Awkward doesn't even begin to describe it...
In other news, the Greatest movie of ALL TIME is coming out soon. It's called Big City, and from what I gather it's a western played by little kids!
That maniacal smile can only mean one thing: Cult Classic. There's been posters promoting it all over the city including rue St Denis, a street famous for its old a.m whores. Nothing like seeing an the old withered whore leaning against a poster that featured all the little girls in the movie, including this one:

The WTF factor with this movie is so incredibly high for me, I'm sure it won't be quite as good as it is in my head. At least I can bank on outdated stereotypes and racist caricatures galore.
Here's the trailer:

DUNGEON PARTY IN PAREEEEE

Last night I went to a Fiasco System party with Mathieu and Baker. It was at les caves de Chapelais in the 9th. Very, very awesome venue, you know if you're into dungeon style clubs with no windows. The crowd was a delightful mix of disgruntled 30 year olds, and models from South Carolina. On the metro we saw this first time wino. He was great and had a frown for the ages:
Anyway here's a short clip of Soft Circle from last night's party.

SPORTS? HUH?

When you move to another country most of the time you're too busy discovering your new city to get homesick. Of course once in a while, when you have a few moments to reflect, you can't help but miss your family, your pals, local haunts etc. Yesterday was one of those days. Thankfully I called up the new vice intern Baker to get a little taste of America. We watched football, and ate nachos! It was nice to have a person explain the rules of Football to me, for years the word "down" only really meant the opposite of of up for me. Turns out I was wrong. I wasn't fully convinced by what I saw, but I did kind of understand the thrill of seeing a man swerve through a bunch of 400 pound beasts, just to get those 10 yards.

LSU Tigers 2007 SEC title, 21-14. Well done fellas!